One issue many couples fight about in marriage is money. Money is a need for a family, and couples can have issues because of the differences in the way each spouse views and uses money. If this is one of the main issues you are struggling with in your marriage, it might be time to seek counseling services for help. Marriage counseling may be able to help you and your spouse stop fighting about money; however, it might take some changes in the way you think and spend the money you have.
Understand The Differences
In a marriage, there is often one spouse who is a saver and one who is a spender. If you are the saver and your spouse is the spender, you are likely to be the one complaining about money or bringing up issues relating to it.
In many cases, it is the husband that spends more, and this is often because men tend to be riskier. Women, on the other hand, tend to relate their security directly to money. Because of this, they may tend to lean towards saving more than spending. This can be the other way around too, though. It just depends on your situation.
Through counseling, you both may be able to understand the other person's perspective on money, and this could be the beginning of the solutions you need to stop fighting about this really big issue. As you both begin to understand the other's perspective, it may help each of you realize the mistakes you making.
Locate The Issues
Counseling will help you understand the differences in the way each of you think, and it can also help you locate the problems. If your spouse, for example, is being irresponsible with money, he or she might have a big problem. If he or she is gambling away the money you have, this would be a big issue that would need to change. If he or she is lazy and will not work, this too could be a big problem.
The goal of counseling for money issues is to determine what the real problems are, and this is something that can be achieved just by talking to a counselor. In addition, it will take complete honesty from each person. If you are the spender in the family, you will need to admit this, and the counselor will try to determine what is causing you to do this.
Once the major issues are unveiled, your counselor will try to help you both come up with solutions and a plan to fix the money issues you have.
Find Solutions For The Problem
If either spouse has a spending addiction of some kind, the counselor might recommend individual counseling for that person. When the problems are not that severe, the counselor may recommend other solutions.
One solution would be to get rid of any individual accounts each person has and obtain a joint bank account. You would both have to put all your paychecks in this account, and you would have to pay the bills together and manage the excess funds jointly. By doing this, you would both have complete control over the money coming in and leaving, and this might help you each feel more confident about the situation.
In addition, your counselor might recommend getting help from a financial advisor or debt management firm if you are severely in debt and cannot find a way out.
Fighting over money may be a common battle in marriages, but it does not have to be. If you are tired of fighting over this issue, talk to your spouse about seeking help from a marriage counselor.Share